Being a part of the swinger lifestyle can get pretty complicated in more ways than one. Even getting a hang of the lingo can be tricky at times. But trust us, it can also be extremely rewarding! Here are some of the popular swinger vocabulary words you may encounter, along with their definitions:

lifestyle

short for swinger lifestyle, this word may refer to the swinger community or anything related to swinging

 

How long have you been in the lifestyle?

We attend lifestyle events at least once a month.

 

vanilla

a word used to describe someone or something not related to the swinger community

 

We tried to get them to come to the party, but they’re vanilla.

We keep our vanilla lives very separate from our swinging activities.

 

unicorn

a nickname given to single female swingers, the name stems from the fact that unicorns don’t exist and single female swingers sometimes seem not to either

 

Many couples go to swingers clubs in search of a unicorn.

Jane wasn’t a unicorn for very long, she met her new partner at party last week!

 

play

a word that swingers use for sex or any type of sexual activity

 

We love to swing but we never play on the first date.

The party got so wild that people began to play right on the dance floor!

 

swapping

the exchanging of partners between two couples

 

Tony and Tina sometimes play with singles, but they prefer swapping.

We love swapping, but finding a couple that is a match for both of us isn’t always easy!

 

full swap

swapping that includes intercourse, couples that identify as full swap are open to having sex with new partners

 

We are only looking for other couples into full swap.

Full swap is the best part of swinging!

 

soft swap

swapping that does not include intercourse, couples that identify as soft swap may engage in play that includes same room sex with other couples, or actual swapping with various levels of foreplay

 

We agreed to try swinging but we are only interested in soft swap for now.

Soft swap couples are just getting their feet wet, but they’ll jump on in once they realize how much fun swinging can be!

 

hall pass

permission given to one partner to play without the other

 

He told me that he had a hall pass but I called his wife just to be sure.

We agreed on a hall pass policy whenever either of us is away.

 

threesome

any of the number of various configurations in which three people have sex simultaneously

 

She enjoyed her first threesome so much that she began attending swinger parties regularly.

We never swap or play alone, we are only looking to add a third for some threesome fun!

 

orgy

many people having sex simultaneously and in various configurations, usually  in full view of each other

 

Most of the couples were shy at first, but by the end of the night they were engaged in an all out orgy!

He disliked orgy style sex parties and preferred more intimate encounters.

 

gangbang

when one person engages in sex with many partners, most commonly a woman with multiple men

 

Her sexual appetite was insatiable, she was a proud gangbang girl!

Single males are sometimes ostracized when it comes to the swinger lifestyle, but they sure are necessary for most gangbang parties.

 

on-premise

an event where sexual activity is allowed to take place

 

Our favorite on-premise club is Bowery Bliss.

We are voyeurs that love on-premise events!

 

off-premise

an event where sexual activity is not allowed, usually a meet-and-greet style event

 

Many off-premise events are held in close proximity to a hotel for obvious reasons.

They prefer connecting with other couples on a personal level first, and really enjoy off-premise events when meeting other swingers.

Okay! Now that you’ve learned some of the words you make come across, it’s time to start exploring!